Found on the interwebs: loose screws tightened with inanity

When I have the luxury of time (which isn't often and when it is, usually comprises a couple hours here and there), I do what anyone does and troll the interwebs for semi-interesting, time-wasting articles to read. Here are a couple of good ones I came across today:

While Twitter is warning its users to protect against spear phishing, telling them to 'designate one computer to use for Twitter... Don't use this computer to read email or surf the web to reduce the chances of malware infection', those oh-so-wise folks at The Onion actually seem to be taking security matters more seriously. They interviewed privacy and security expert Karen Seubert from Chase Bank who handed out such pearls of wisdom like, 'charter a seafaring vessel...and throw your computer overboard' and 'disassemble the computer and...puree [the parts] into a thick slurry.' After all, if you leave your designated Twitter/bank account-checking computer still able to plug in (as opposed to destroying it beyond all recognition), what's to stop anyone with a black heart from ruining your life forever?

I usually skip over articles that predict the future...except this one from the chairman of Google. Not quite McLuhanesque but still containting kernels of elegance, the world seems to already be halfway there on the items on this list.

This Slate article makes me so glad that I a) don't have kids; b) don't want kids; c) am not a teenager in 2013; and d) don't have teens of my own in 2013. Life in high school was shitty enough; throw smartphones into the mix, and any mistake a kid makes is broadcast instantly and permanently.

Going offline for a year is an interesting concept, but I disagree with Atlantic Wire's conclusion that it doesn't make you happier for different reasons. It's like a more sophisticated version of Encino Man: transplant a caveman into modern times and the stress and pressure of trying to live in an era when you're the only different one, and by a lot, can outweigh any benefits that being offline has to offer.

Here's a lol-er for you courtesy of Buzzfeed, and a lesson on why it pays to double-, triple-, and quadruple-check your work before it goes out.